Monday, 10 March 2014

Learn how to take a compliment


Recently I complimented someone I see regularly on their perfume, they smelt amazing. To which they applied straight away with "Thanks, at least that makes up for how fat I am".

This wasn't to make me feel awkward, it was just a flippant comment about themselves which shocked me. So I said "please don't think that way, you are lovely just the way you are".

What surprised me most about this reaction, is that it came  from a woman who works within the beauty industry, she is always well-presented, glamorous with her makeup and what I see the most in her, is her sunny disposition and that she always asks how I am when I see her. She owns her own beauty salon, is the employer of a large staff, helps women feel good about themselves and here she was being so derogatory about herself. Her excuse for being this way?, because it was one of those "womanly" days.

I can understand that, there will always be days where you don't feel on top of your game, you feel a bit crappy and think that you are not looking your best.

But if someone offers you a compliment, take it. Let it soak in for a minute, wait a few seconds before replying and then reply with "thank you, what a lovely think to say" or "thank you for noticing" (they can't see what you think are your faults). Own it, take it willingly. Don't throw it away with a downbeat reply. That may in turn make the giver of the compliment feel awkward. They may feel shut down from talking to you any further. They wont know how to a manage the situation, as you have already discounted their opinion. Remember that it can take a lot for someone to compliment another person, accept it and feel happy taking a compliment.

You deserve it.

7 comments:

  1. What a lovely post. So sad to hear somebody say that about theirselves. I recently went on holiday with two of my best friends and one of them couldn't name one thing she liked about herself, ONE THING!! I made her think of 5 before the end of the holiday and she could think of one or two. Now every now & then I text her a compliment or ask her to tell me something she likes about herself!

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    1. I love that you are actively making your friend find the positives. It does not even have to be about appearance. I just feel like we are all a bit too hard on ourselves when we should be pumping ourselves up instead! x

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  2. Brilliant post Liz. Why do we find it so hard to like ourselves? I often make a point of complimenting people - even strangers which gets me some weird looks! - but really have to make a conscious effort to accept compliments myself. x

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    1. I also compliment strangers because I know that it would brighten my day if I got the same in return. I do it too, I find myself not really accepting what others say about me, but I'm trying very hard!

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  3. So true! I always compliment people and feel so awkward when they point out a flaw afterwards. Thanks for sharing!

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  4. Great post! This is so true, even for me, sometimes I say "thank you" but it is in one ear out the other!

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  5. loveeee love love this and agree 100%! thank you for posting! Xo

    welltraveledwife.com

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